May The Fourth Be With you


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Nov 25, 2019
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Happy May 4th, a day that people used to think was just a typical day, but thanks to an uncanny resemblance to a famous movie line and an army of Disney's finest marketeers is now Star Wars Day!

I love Star Wars, always have and always will, I'm the kind of fool who upon reading they were selling motorized BB8's leapt out of bed and took a taxi down to queue at the Disney store on a cold winters eve for a midnight opening just to buy one. It cost me about a 100 Euros, I used it about four times and I'm still telling myself it was worth it for the joy of watching him roll about.

Loving Star Wars like I do means I have a wealth of useless information stored up for special days like today and I want to put a question to the people. What bizarre part of the Star Wars Expanded Universe would you love to see get featured in a video game?

The old EU was chock full of absolute madness and it's beautiful, I totally understand why they tried to quietly move on from keeping it canon and cherry pick the cool parts - like Thrawn - but there's a deep well full of very odd things that deserve to be seen in glorious 4k. Here's my top three picks and if you want to delve, Wookiepedia is a place where you can read dissertation level entries about characters who you see for half a second in the movies:

Irek Ismaren


Just look at him, he has Lightsabers surgically grafted to his knees AND elbows. Perfect mid-tier boss caliber guy that you'd fight on a lava planet while he throws Tie Fighters at you with the Force. He also calls himself Lord Nyax, which is a pretty good account name for Battlefront 2.

The Giant Weasel Han Solo Punched

Big party member energy coming off this one. Selonian's are a weird concept in general, but an unsentimental giant weasel would always have a place in my main crew.

Trioculus, The Emperor's Son - but Not Really

So the Emperor has a three-eyed mutant son, but that's not Trioculus. Trioculus is an unrelated three eyed mutant who pretends to be the Emperor's son who is named and I cannot stress this enough - Triclops. I don't even know what you'd do, but anything would be great - look at that image where he marries an android Princess Leia who shoots lasers at him and tell me there's not a place in a hypothetical MOBA for this wonderful mistake.

This is straight from the Wookiepedia article, warning if you've ever wondered what psychic damage IRL feels like, this comes pretty close.

The self-proclaimed son of Palpatine, Trioculus was in actuality an impostor, usurping the role of Palpatine's true son, three-eyed mutant Triclops. Spurred on by a prophecy of Rajah Ubooki, the false Kadann, he sought the glove of Darth Vader to establish his legitimacy. Trioculus's pursuit of the Jedi Prince Ken and his infatuation with Leia Organa pitted him against rival Zorba Desilijic Tiure, and led to him being taken captive by the Hutt and frozen in carbonite. Trioculus was eventually betrayed by Kadann, who sought the Imperial throne himself, and in the end was assassinated by a New Republic droid.



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As long as they DO have Thrawn and do NOT have anything from Splinter of the Mind's Eye, I'm good.

Best Star Wars memory - accosting Jar Jar in Star Wars Galaxy beta:

Well, OK, it wasn't actually Jar Jar, but it could have been a blood relative. Close enough for me.
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